Definitions by women

Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. ----- A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.

Airhead (er*hed) n. ----- What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.

Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n ------ You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner."

Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. ----- Jokes that are short so men can understand them.

Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n ----- Gotta get married in a church.

Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. ----- An appliance designed to eat socks.

Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. ----- A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms.

Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. ------- The last two minutes of a football game.

Exercise (ex*er*siz) v ----- To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.

Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. - What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.

Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. ------------ Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician."

Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n Similar to a black hole in space-if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.

Childbirth (child*brth) n. --------- You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."

Lipstick (lip*stik) n On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!

Park (park) v./n. ----- Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere and neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.

Patience (pa*shens) n. ----- The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers."

Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. ----- Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.

Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n ---. A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card

Graphics from:

: background : books & apple, : police man

: Brbque man : pretty girl : dryer, fridge, tissue

: diet cola, bird feeder, val. couple,

: star football thingy : diet sign, hair cut sign, preg. ,

George's Wedpage: church Sandi's Graphics Gallery : tool

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