ONLY IN AMERICA !

Only In America... can pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.

Only In America...are there handicap parking places in front of a
skating rink.

Only In America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the
back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can
buy cigarettes at the front.

Only In America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries
and a diet coke.

Only In America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.

Only In America...do we leave cars worth tens of thousands of dollars
in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only In America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and
then have Call Waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't
want to talk to in the first place.

Only In America...do we buy hotdogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.

Only In America...do we use the word "politics" to describe the
process so well:  "Poli" in Latin meaning "many"  and "tic" meaning
"bloodsucking" creatures.

Only In America...do they have driveup ATM machines with Braille
lettering.

Only In America...can a homeless combat veteran live in a cardboard
box and a draft dodger live in a White House.