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Holy Grail Sounds, Wavs and Midis

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These sound wavs were collected from "Monty Python's The Holy Grail". If you would like to save one of the wav or midi sounds, and are using Netscape Navigator, right click on a sound and "Save Link As". If you are using Internet Explorer, right click on a sound and use "Save Target As".



Some Loverly Songs

Holy Grail Theme - Midi

Brave Sir Robin - Midi

Knights of the Round Table Song - Wav

The Trouble with Swallows

You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin' 'em together. - Wav

Are you suggesting coconuts migrate? Not at all, they could be carried. What, a swallow carrying a coconut? It could grip it by the husk. It's not a question of where he grips it, it's a simple question of weight ratios. A 5 ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut - Wav

Listen, in order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings 43 times every second, right? Please! Am I right? I'm not interested! - Wav

Will you ask your master if he wants to join my court at Camelot?! But then of course African swallows are not migratory. Oh, yeah... - Wav

Wait a minute -- supposing two swallows carried it together? No, they'd have to have it on a line. Well, simple! They'd just use a strand of creeper! - Wav

Just Die Already

Bring out your dead! Bring out your dead! - Wav

I'm not dead!! - Wav

He says he's not dead! Yes, he is. I'm not! He isn't? Well, he will be soon, he's very ill. - Wav

I'm getting better! No you're not, you'll be stone dead in a moment - Wav

I don't want to go on the cart! Oh, don't be such a baby! - Wav

You're not foolin' anyone you know. - Wav

I feel happy! I feel happy! (thud) - Wav

Repression is Nine Tenths of the Law?

Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. - Wav

I mean, if I went around sayin' I was an empereror just because some moistened bink had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away! - Wav

Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you! - Wav

Help! Help! I'm being repressed!! - Wav

Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! - Wav

Arthur meets a Brave Knight and cuts off his limbs

None shall pass. - Wav

'Tis but a scratch.Your arm's off!!! No it isn't - Wav

Come on ya pansy! - Wav

Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left. Yes I have. Look! Just a flesh wound. - Wav

What are you going to do, bleed on me? - Wav

Chicken! Look, I'll have your leg. Right! (whack) - Wav

All right, we'll call it a draw - Wav

Oh, I see, running away, eh? - Wav

You yellow bastard!! Come back here and take what's coming to you!! - Wav

Victory is mine! - Wav

You're a looney! - Wav

I'll bite your legs off!! - Wav

Witches and How to Build Bridges out of them

We have found a witch, may we burn her? - Wav

I'm not a witch, I'm not a witch! - Wav

They dressed me up like this. No we didn't! No! No! And this isn't my nose, it's a false one! - Wav

Did you dress her up like this? No, no... no ... yes. Yes, yes, a bit, a bit. She has got a wart. - Wav

She Turned me into a newt. A Newt? I got better. - Wav

So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood? Build a bridge out of her!! - Wav

Why Nobody Likes the French

He says they've already got one. Are you sure he's got one? Oh yes, it's very nice. - Wav

I'm French!! Why do you think I have this outrageous accent you silly king? - Wav

What are you doing in England? Mind your own business! - Wav

I blow my nose at you so called Arthur King, you and all your silly English kniggits. - Wav

You don't frighten us English pigdogs! - Wav

I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! - Wav

Go and boil your bottom sons of a silly person! - Wav

I fart in your general direction! - Wav

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. - Wav

Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time. - Wav

Run Away!! Run Away!! - Wav

And this one is for your mother! - Wav

Who leaps out? Uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I. Uh, leap out of the rabbit, and and uh.... Ohhhhhhh - Wav


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