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In other families, it's called coloring Easter eggs. In ours, it's a ritual which involves more than just taking hard-boiled eggs and smearing or dipping them in food coloring and declaring the task done. No there's much more to it than that. You are creating a memory that will be called forth next year and the next and the next for decades to come. Here's how it's done.
A dozen or so eggs are used each year. This allows for the misfortune that eggs always encounter, as well as some that just don't make the grade as a historic marker. Eggs are removed from the frig and allowed to come to room temperature. Wash them well to remove any lingering dirt, bacteria or what have you that the hen, farmer, processor, distributor and store may not have removed or perhaps added along the way. Then with the aid of an electric drill or a dremel type tool, a hole is drilled in both ends of the egg. The hole needs to be larger than a tooth pick, because you take a tooth pick and inserting it into the end of the egg, you scramble the contents. Remove the toothpick, and treat the opposite end to the same forced entry. This is essential as the egg has a second lining that must be disrupted. There is an air sac on the big end of the egg that is formed by a rather tough membrane. Puncturing the membrane and then scrambling the yoke and albumin readies the egg for the next assault. You blow the contents out of the egg by placing your mouth on one end and blowing hard. You will quickly discover that the holes are too small if you can't get more than a tiny flow from the opposite end of the egg. On the other hand, too large a hole weakens the shell structure and is unattractive.
Blowing the jelly like omelette precursor from the egg into a waiting glass doesn't require a lot of talent, just good lungs and the ability to ignore comments and antics of others about the table. Don't be surprised if you get tickled, have funny faces made at you, jokes and barbs fly without stop. It's best to have a tight sphincter as well, as the force imparted on the tiny opening will make your face red, your ears pop, and may cause release of an unexpected discharge of gas from a distant opening.
Now you are ready for the real fun. Food coloring makes a good ink and a toothpick is a good instrument for drawing. Let you mind direct your hands. Is it art, a witty saying, perhaps just a blotched job that when dry takes on a certain beauty. Regardless, it's over before you would like as the number of eggs is never enough for the talent assembled. The only answer is to wait for next year.
Those eggs that meet with approval are then placed in baskets to accompany candy in celebration of Easter. There they join the eggs of Easter's past in all their glory.
With the end of the candy and some weeks after Easter it becomes the sad task of placing the eggs into cartons for storage until the next year. How sad to see them gone from the table, but we all look forward to next year "coloring" more and better eggs. Or, better yet revisiting those that were colored many years past.
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