| Phoenix Chapter 1: Day of Fire (Friday) Chapter 2: Rebirth (Saturday morning) Chapter 3: Shower Scenes (Saturday afternoon) Chapter 4: Doubts (Sunday night / Monday) Chapter 5: Reflections (Tuesday morning) Chapter 6: Night out (Tuesday evening) Chapter 7: Revelations (Wednesday afternoon) Chapter 8: Survivors (Thursday) Chapter 9: Christmas (Epilogue) |
| 'Phoenix' was my first published fanfic. When I started, I thought I was done after Ch 2. Silly me. I have found I write long form more often than short. This is also where the story truly becomes slash. This story takes place Thankskgiving weekend, 2000, about 2 and a half years after 'The Odd Couple." Jack and Lennie have been roommates for a while now, and a crisis forces them to explore just how much their feelings for each other have grown . . . |
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| Phoenix: Chapter 1: Day of Fire Lennie Briscoe sighed contentedly. For once in his rotten, messed-up life, things were going well, had been for some time now. He should have known that this was a prescription for something awful to happen soon. But then, the best parts of his life had an annoying tendency to be born from the ashes of the worst. Three years ago, after the brutal murder of his daughter Cathy, he had moved into Jack McCoy�s apartment. Jack knew Lennie was a recovering alcoholic and that if anything could push him back into a bottle this was it. Lennie�s friends had banded together to make sure he had the support he needed to get through that dark day and the ones following it. For the first time in a long time, Lennie felt he actually had something of a family. The biggest surprise had come the following week. Jack had encouraged Lennie to stay one more week, since often the return to normalcy after a crisis was worse than the crisis. Jack knew from experience � he had lost his assistant and lover Claire two years prior, and he and Lennie both still bore the scars of that fateful day. Their friendship had been born in the ashes of that fire, from their shared guilt and grief at Claire�s death. And now, out of the fire of Cathy�s death, they had found comfort in each others� company. Both had lived alone too long and forgotten the simple pleasure of having somebody to talk to at the end of the day. So to everybody�s surprise, including their own, they ended up as roommates. Lennie moved his few things over one weekend and gladly let go of his �mouse hole of an apartment.� The arrangement suited them well. Lennie jokingly described it as �like being married except without the sex and the fighting. Hey, ma, I got me a lawyer!� Jack�s place was certainly much nicer than he�d ever have been able to afford on a cop�s salary � especially one with 2 alimony checks taken out each payday. Now he paid Jack a little less than he used to pay for the mouse hole, and both of them ended up ahead of the game. And it turned out that Jack really liked to cook as long as he had somebody else to clean up afterwards, which suited Lennie just fine. Many evenings one of the other of them would be working late, but they both found that even when they did, they didn�t stay as late as they would have before. And a big bonus � Jack realized that since he stopped keeping booze at home to keep the temptation away from Lennie, his own drinking was down. Way down. Looking back, he could now see that he had been a lot closer to that line than he had thought he was. In short, they had miraculously found their own version of domestic bliss. Of course, nothing was perfect. Gossip being what it was, some people were determined to make it something that it wasn�t. Whenever this gossip floated past Lennie, he�d just roll his eyes and make a comment about Jack�s reputation with his female assistants. OK, so HE knew that Jack hadn�t touched a woman since Claire died. THEY didn�t have to know that. Lennie knew it would take somebody really special to pry their way into Jack�s heart now. Too much scar tissue there for most to get through. As to himself, Lennie had given up on romance years ago. Two failed marriages were enough. Oh, he still noticed the pretty girls � Jack�s latest assistant, Abbie, he definitely noticed her! But he was well past the age where his charming wit was enough to get them into his bed. So the two bachelors found contentment in their companionship, and life was good. So naturally, all hell was about to break loose. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was the day after Thanksgiving. Black Friday to the retail world. Lennie was at work � crooks don�t take holidays off, so neither do the police. Young officers with families got first crack at getting holiday time off, and Lennie was so far down the list he figured he�d see another holiday off about 10 years after he retired. But he didn�t mind, by now the holidays didn�t mean much anyway. Jack settled in for a quiet day at home. He had brought some case files home to work on. Thanksgiving weekend bored him � every damn channel on the TV had a football game. Basketball was his game, he had never cared much for football. About 3PM, he realized he had left something at the office that he needed. After dithering about it for a while, he decided to head over and grab it. At least it would get him outside for a while, and give him an excuse to take out the bike. Just before he left, he called Lennie and asked if he would be able to join him a little later for dinner, since he was out anyway. Lennie agreed and said he�d meet Jack at his office around 5. Jack pulled his bike into the parking garage next to the office building that housed the DA�s office and took his usual spot right next to the elevator. One advantage of riding a motorcycle, you could grab the smallest spots close in. He took the elevator up to the exit and walked around to the employee entrance at the back of the building. The usual guard had the holiday off; there was a very young guy, probably straight out of the academy, who checked his ID and waved him through. Just the other side of the building, a figure moved in the shadows. //Good,// he thought, //I KNEW he�d show up sometime today. Bastard doesn�t even know what to do with a day off. Probably works in his sleep.// He slipped his fingers through the brass knuckles in his pocket and walked confidently up to the employee entrance. The young guard asked to see his employee id. �Here�s your fucking id, junior� as he swung his fist right into the kid�s temple, killing him instantly. He stepped over the guard�s body and began looking for his quarry. In his office, Jack quickly found the files he needed and settled down to wait for Lennie. It was about 4PM, he had about an hour to kill, might as well get some work done . . . The whole office was eerily quiet, almost like a ghost town. The few people who had come in that morning were long gone by now. So when he heard the footsteps a few minutes later, he wondered who was here at this hour. He got up and went to his door, calling out �Lennie, is that you?� ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Back at the 27, Lennie was in the unenviable position of being the most senior officer present. He did NOT like this at all. As such, he was taking any �unusual� phone calls. Just after 4PM, the phone rang. �Uh, Det. Briscoe, we�ve got a silent alarm sounding at the DA�s office. I just tried to contact the officer posted to security today, and he�s not answering. We�ve dispatched a squad car, but I thought somebody up there should know.� Lennie�s heart dropped into his stomach. Jack should have gotten there just a little while ago. Could he have accidentally set off the alarm? But what about the guard? His partner, Ed Green, was watching him intently. He relayed the message to Ed and said �Come on. Let�s head over there. I was supposed to meet Jack for diner in an hour anyway; if it�s just a screw up, you can drop me off and head home yourself.� But Lennie�s eyes were saying he didn�t think it was a screw up. There was panic in those eyes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The blow came from the side, catching Jack entirely off guard. �You are such a pathetic piece of humanity that you don�t even know what to do with a holiday off!� Jack looked up at a mountain of a man from the floor of his office where he had landed. �Who the hell are you?� he asked, stalling, trying desperately to get his legs to work again. �You don�t even recognize me? You destroy a man�s life and you don�t even know his NAME? Does Bobby Owens ring a bell?� The mountain reached down and grabbed Jack by his right arm and jerked him upright. Jack cried out as his shoulder dislocated. Through the fog of pain, he tried to remember. Owens . . . yes, a thug he had put away a few years ago on a relatively small time charge. He remembering wishing at the time that they had something more serious to charge him with; the man was dangerously unstable. Owens held him there dangling by the injured arm for a moment before throwing him down to the floor again. Jack cried out again as he landed on his arm with the decisive �snap� of a broken bone. �You�re gonna die, McCoy. But you�re gonna HURT first. This place is deserted for the holiday. Nobody�s gonna come save your sorry ass now. Nobody.� . // Oh, God! This maniac is going to kill me! Lennie, where are you when I need you? Lennie!!! // The big man�s hands came toward him again. Big, thick hands. His father�s hands. // Lennie!!!!! //The tears streamed down his face as terror beat out pain for control of his body. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The squad car had arrived and found the body of the guard. They radioed the situation to dispatch, who called Briscoe and Green. Lennie�s face went white at the news. �Dammit, Ed, faster! Jack�s in there with a cop killer!� A few minutes later they squealed to a stop in front of the office building. There was one light visible up on the tenth floor � Jack�s office. Lennie and Ed rushed into the building, taking the elevator up to the 9th floor, then exiting in favor of the stairs. Ed reached the top first, took in the scene: A man � if you could call him that - was holding Jack in front of him with a very large knife to his throat. The uniformed officers had him at gunpoint, but it was a standoff. The knife was too close; if the officers shot, Jack would be dead before the bullets got there. Ed quickly ducked back down the stairs before the big man noticed him and caught Lennie before he got to the top. He whispered for a moment then headed back down the stairs to the floor below to come up the stairs on the other side of the hallway, where he wouldn�t be seen. Lennie steeled himself. //I�m coming, Jack. Just hold on. I�m coming.// He rushed up the last of the stairs, then froze at the tableaux before him. Compared to this 7 foot 300 pound giant, Jack looked almost like a doll � a broken doll. Ed burst from the stairs behind them, charging at the big man. The movement both front and behind him distracted Owens just enough for the knife to drop enough for one of the uniforms to get in a shot. The rest happened so fast Lennie was never sure exactly what happened. The big man started as the bullet hit his skull. The knife moved as Owens reflexively tried to finish what he started. Ed crashed into them from behind, knocking the knife from Owens� hand. Jack was thrown halfway down the hall from the impact. Lennie ran the couple of feet remaining between him and Jack, practically threw himself onto the floor and gently lifted his friend into his arms. �Call an ambulance,� he shouted to the uniformed officers. Jack looked up at him, barely recognizing him through the fog of pain. �Lennie? You came for me?� // Oh, God, Jack, don�t ever do that to me again. Don�t you ever leave me, you hear? Cause I just couldn�t stand that. Not now. // �I�m here, Jack. It�s ok. It�s over now. You�re safe.� Jack looked up into Lennie�s eyes just in time to see the tears spill over. They sat there on the floor huddled together, Jack�s head cradled on Lennie�s shoulder, Lennie murmering soft reassurances, until the paramedics arrived. In the meantime, Ed had taken charge of the crime scene and all the pesky details. Lennie hadn�t actually taken part in the action; he had decided to leave his partner out of the official details so he wouldn�t be trapped here when the ambulance took McCoy to the hospital. He looked over at them again and wondered. Lennie always downplayed the rumors, but his eyes were telling him a different story right now. // Don�t matter, man, and ain�t none of your business anyway. He�s your partner, and you back him up, no matter what. // Ed shook his head and went over to talk to the officer who actually took the perp down. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lennie rode with the ambulance and wouldn�t be kept out when Jack was wheeled into an examining room. When asked his relationship to the patient, Lennie growled �Friend . . . family . . . I don�t know!� and pushed his way in anyhow. Since Jack couldn�t move his arm above his head, they took the quick route and cut his sweatshirt off. The entire right shoulder area was badly bruised. Lennie was sure he saw colors in there that didn�t exist in nature. Jack moaned in pain a couple of times as the intern diagnosed his dislocated shoulder and broken arm � both on the right. �That right arm is going to be out of commission for a good long while. We�re going to have to pop that shoulder back into the socket, Mr. McCoy, and it�s going to hurt.� Jack nodded, �Just do it.� Lennie cringed as he heard the terrible grinding sound and Jack�s cry of pain, but it was over in a few seconds. The intern checked the movement of Jack�s arm and nodded. �OK, I�m going to give you a shot for the pain, and we�ll get you down to get that arm in a cast and wrap this shoulder.� He turned to Lennie while scribbling on a prescription pad; �You won�t be able to go with him right now, but I�d suggest you go down to the hospital pharmacy and get these filled; by the time you get done there, he should be back and you can take him home.� An hour later, Lennie returned to the Emergency Room waiting area but no sign of Jack. After pacing nervously for about 15 minutes, an orderly came down the hall pushing Jack in a wheelchair. His right shoulder was wrapped tightly; the forearm was held by one of the newfangled plastic casts, strapped tight across his chest so that he couldn�t move the arm or shoulder at all. The phrase �trussed up like a turkey� came unbidden into Lennie�s mind as he walked over to them. �Ready to get out of here, Jack?� he asked. �Oh, god, yes.� As he stood up and the orderly took the wheelchair down the hall, Lennie realized that Jack�s coat was probably still back at the office, and even his sweatshirt was a casualty of the day�s events. Instead of putting his overcoat back on, he wrapped it around Jack�s shoulders. �Here, you need this more than me right now. Stay in here while I grab a cab.� ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Half an hour later, they were back at the apartment. Lennie took the overcoat and tossed it over a chair. Jack had been quiet the entire trip home. Now he headed back towards his room saying �I�m going to find a shirt.� Lennie nodded and went to the kitchen to scrounge some dinner. A few minutes later, Jack came out carrying an old flannel shirt. �Uh, Lennie, can you give me a hand here? I seem to be short one,� he asked sheepishly. Lennie helped him into the shirt, gently wrapping it around the wounded shoulder and buttoning one button to keep it in place. // Oh, boy, this is going to get interesting ,//Lennie thought as the memories came back of the broken arm he had had as a kid. Worst part was dressing and bathing. You ever try to put underwear on with only one arm? Not possible. When you�re 16 and you mother has to dress you, you just about die of embarrassment. When you�re 50-something and your roommate has to dress you . . . // Uh, oh, could be getting into trouble here, Lennie boy. // They said that most people got curious about the �other side� at some point in their lives. What with all the rumors about them anyway, Lennie wasn�t too surprised that one day his mind had wandered down that path. Jack was a good friend, someone he cared about deeply. Truth be told, they were much closer than the �guy code� really allowed for. All those nights, after Claire�s and Cathy�s deaths, they had sat up talking and crying on each others� shoulders. If he were capable of loving another man, it would definitely be Jack. And now, this . . . He remembered the panic, the fear, this afternoon when he thought Jack might die today. Was it love already? The paramedics had given Jack a sedative to calm him before taking him to the hospital, but he could feel its effects wearing off. The painkiller numbed the physical pain, but the terror was returning. As Lennie�s strong hands gently tucked him into the shirt, something inside snapped. �Oh, God, Lennie, I thought he was going to kill me!� Lennie looked up and saw the terror in his friend�s eyes. He reached out and laid his hand on Jack�s good shoulder. �I know, Jack. But it�s over now. You�re safe at home. With me.� Their eyes met, and Jack�s tears spilled over again. Lennie gently gathered him into his arms and led him to the couch. Once again, Lennie held him as the shock of the day poured out of him. At one point, almost without thinking, Lennie bent down and kissed the top of his head, like you would comfort a small child. �Sshhh . . . it�s all right now.� After a time, Jack�s tears finally ran out, and a certain calmness returned. He sighed heavily and very purposefully settled his head against Lennie�s shoulder. �Lennie . . .there�s something I have to tell you. No- don�t interrupt me. I have to say this. Lennie, I really thought I was going to die this afternoon. I�ve never been so scared in all my life. He held that knife at my throat and all I could think of was you, Lennie. Not Claire. YOU.� He sat up slightly so that he could look into Lennie�s eyes. There. He had said it. Would Lennie understand? Would he realize how important that simple statement was? It had been almost 5 years since Claire died, and there still was not room in his heart for another woman. Maybe there never would be. But this friendship that had grown so deep these past few years, that was something else entirely. And as he now realized, there was nothing like looking death in the face to let you know what was really important to you. Today, he had realized just how much Lennie had come to mean to him. // I originally asked Lennie to stay for the companionship; till he came, I didn�t realize how lonely I had become. Could it be that even then, I was lonely for more than just company? I didn�t want to admit to myself how good it felt to hold him those long evenings after Cathy died. Today, through all the pain and fear, all I wanted was to feel those strong arms around me. Taking me away from that horror. Keeping me safe . . .// Lennie froze, uncertainty wrenching his gut. Could Jack be saying what he thought he was saying? Could Lennie have actually taken Claire�s place in his heart? But as he looked into Jack�s eyes, he saw the truth in it. He reached out and gently caressed Jack�s face, rough with 5-o�clock shadow. Odd � he was used to the softness of a woman. Then suddenly, both were leaning in to the kiss, their eyes closing just as their lips touched for the first time. It started very gently, a simple press of lips. Then Lennie�s hand slid around to pull Jack harder into the kiss. After only a moment�s hesitation, Jack surrendered and opened his mouth, suddenly hungering to lose himself, lose all the pain and fear of this day, in the wonder of that kiss. He slid his good left arm around Lennie�s back, pulling him closer, wishing for all the world that he had both arms to work with. Eventually, Lennie broke away, ending the kiss. A gentle hand again caressed Jack�s face. �Jack, we can�t do this now. Not today. You�re hurt. You�ve been through too much today. I can�t be sure you really want this. It could be a reaction to the stress. It could be a weird drug interaction. I don�t have that excuse � you know how I feel now, and I can�t take that back. But I can�t go any further and take the chance that you would hate me in the morning.� Jack looked deep into Lennie�s eyes, saw the very real concern there, and nodded. Truth be told, he was somewhat relieved. A part of him wanted this, wanted it badly. He had definitely started to feel his body react to that kiss. He hadn�t felt that way in a LONG time. But part of him was a little afraid. This was new territory. He had to admit that he wasn�t at his best right now. Better not to do anything rash. �Yeah, you�re probably right,� he said shakily as he reached up to cover Lennie�s hand with his own. �But will you still hold me?� Lennie smiled as they shifted to again gather Jack into a comfortable hold. They sat there like that on the couch for quite a while, not saying anything, just feeling safe and comfortable together. Until at last Lennie�s stomach loudly protested the long overdue status of dinner. By that time, Jack had relaxed enough to eat something, so they ordered a pizza before calling it an evening. When the pizza arrived, Lennie got up to go get some drinks from the fridge and also grabbed the drugs he had gotten at the hospital pharmacy. Sorting through the bottles, he found the one he was looking for. �Here, take this. They said that painkiller shot would probably wear off overnight, so this should knock you out for tonight.� Jack grimaced � �You know, I usually make a LOUSY patient. I HATE being sick.� �Yeah, well you�re not sick this time, you�re injured. Big difference. Lucky for you I had a busted wing back when I was a kid, so I know what you�re going through. So you listen to Dr. Lennie and we�ll get you through this in one piece, OK?� Jack laughed, and Lennie melted inside to hear the sound. After all the pain of this day, that laughter was truly the best medicine for them both. They finished the pizza and settled back onto the couch for a bit. Lennie turned on the TV and channel hopped a while, finally settling on a football game. The stress of the day, the food, and the warmth of Lennie�s arm around his shoulders � not to mention the nighttime painkiller he had taken � conspired to put Jack out cold. At a commercial, Lennie looked down at his friend and smiled. // Is it possible that we could really make this work? I think he meant it as much as I do, but I couldn�t take that chance. I love him enough to take it slow, make sure it�s real. Damn. I love him. // He gently ran his fingers through the silvery hair. �Come on, sleepyhead, bed time.� He practically had to carry Jack back to the bedroom, and gently removed his shirt and jeans. Not being sure exactly what Jack usually wore to bed, he decided to leave him in his skivvies, thereby avoiding THE issue entirely. Well, not entirely. His own body was responding even to the thought of avoiding the issue. Damn. This was going to be an interesting night. He gently settled Jack into bed, drawing the covers over him like a child. A deep tenderness swept through him and he knew that even if tomorrow Jack decided not to take things any farther, their friendship would survive. He reached out and brushed the hair back from Jack�s face and gently kissed his forehead. ��Night, Jack,� he said softly as he headed for his own room. Continue on to Chapter 2 Send me some feedback Back to the story index Disclaimer: These characters belong to Dick Wolf and NBC. I'm just borrowing them for fun, not profit. |