Thoughts of a Lifetime
A Personal Journal As Written And Experienced By Anthony Swaney

Here you will find the story of my life as I have recorded it over the years.  I present it to you, the reader, in hopes that by sharing my own life in the spirit of fellowship, it may have some positive effect on your own life and perhaps even be found as inspirational.  I must make it clear from the start that God is the largest influence in my life.  It is his and Christ's teachings which I hold most dear.  I did not always hold Christian beliefs, and even if you do not share the same faith as myself, I feel that there is much that can be related here.  For the very premise and ultimate principle that guides my life and led me to Christianity is the Pursuit and Understanding of Truth.  And Truth is something that affects us all.  For me, that Truth is given a name in the book of John.  That name is Jesus Christ and it is in him that I will always trust, who I shall always follow and who I devote myself to in Body, Mind and Spirit.  For this reason you will almost always see the word Truth in these pages beginning with a capital T.  This is my own reminder, even when I do not name Jesus directly, that he is ever present in my life.     
Click on a title below to view that entry.  Once in the entries you can click on the arrow keys to move to the next entry and there are even links to my e-mail address, guestbook or forum pages on each page for your convenience.
These first six entries were really just random notes I wrote to myself.  I had an idea that there would be a journal, but never really had one.  I know there were other such documentations, but sadly they are lost.  Here are those I did not lose.  They did not have titles, but I gave them each one here.
Troubled Times-------------------------------Date Unknown:  somewhere mid to late 1988
Troubled Times 2----------------------------------------------Thursday November 24th, 1988
On the Road to Recovery----------------------------------------Friday November 25th, 1988
Hope Rising---------------------------------------------------------Monday January 16th, 1989
Stagnancy------------------------------------------------------Saturday September 16th, 1989
Rebirth-------------------------------------------------------Wednesday November 22nd, 1989

My actual journal begins from this point.

Entry #1: An Introduction
-----------------------------------------Thursday April 11th, 1991
Entry #2: Coming around full circle---------------------------------Friday April 12th, 1991
Entry #3: The best intentions---------------------------------------Monday April 14th, 1991
Entry #4: The Beast in us all--------------------------------------Thursday April 18th, 1991
Entry #5: From the mouth of a Babe------------------------------Monday April 22nd, 1991
Entry #6: Within Satan's Grasp------------------------------------Saturday July 20th, 1991
Entry #7: Life's greatest teacher: part 1--------------------------Friday August 2nd, 1991
Entry #8: Life's greatest teacher: part 2----------------------Saturday August 24th, 1991
Entry #9: Life's greatest teacher: part 3---------------------Friday September 20th, 1991
Entry #10: Thoughts unspoken----------------------------------Saturday October 5th, 1991
Entry #11: Past tense future------------------------------------Saturday January 31st, 1992
Entry #12: Life's Ups & Downs-------------------------------Thursday February 13th, 1992
Entry #13: Honesty is the Best Policy----------------------------Tuesday March 17th, 1992
Entry #14: The winds of change-----------------------------------Monday March 30th, 1992
Entry #15:  In God We Trust-----------------------------------------Monday May 11th, 1992
Entry #16:  A Rose by any other name-----------------------------Tuesday May 19th, 1992
Entry #17:  No Man is an Island-------------------------------------Saturday July 4th, 1992
Entry #18:  Bouts of Depression-------------------------------------Monday July 20th, 1992
Entry #19:  First Impressions-----------------------------Wednesday September 2nd, 1992
Entry #20:  Of Beginnings and Ends--------------------Wednesday September 23rd, 1992
Entry #21:  Happiness Is...----------------------------------------Sunday October 18th, 1992
Entry #22:  The Second Step--------------------------------------Friday November 6th, 1992
Entry #23:  Disciples of Faith-----------------------------------Friday November 13th, 1992
Entry #24:  Soul Searching-------------------------------------------Friday March 19th, 1993
Entry #25:  Hearts of Gold-------------------------------------------Tuesday April 13th, 1993
Entry #26:  Thoughts Evolving----------------------------------Wednesday April 21st, 1993
Entry #27:  The Wages of Sin----------------------------------------Monday May 17th, 1993
Entry #28:  The Child Within--------------------------------------Tuesday August 3rd, 1993
Entry #29:  Mending Fences---------------------------------------Friday October 29th, 1993
Entry #30:  Walking With God-------------------------------Tuesday December 14th, 1993
Entry #31:  New Year's Resolutions----------------------------Saturday January 1st, 1994
Entry #32:  The Whole Truth--------------------------------------Friday January 28th, 1994
Entry #33:  Facing Your Demons------------------------------Monday February 21st, 1994
Entry #34:  A Journey's End and Homecoming-----------------Thursday June 30th, 1994
Entry #35:  Throwing Away the Crutches-------------------Wednesday August 31st, 1994
Entry #36:  Jumping the Hurdles of Life-----------------------Friday December 2nd, 1994
Entry #37:  Thine Own Self Be True-----------------------------Friday February 3rd, 1995
Entry #38:  The Psychology and Mathematics of Dreams------Tuesday April 18th, 1995
Entry #39:  Matters of Importance------------------------------------Friday May 19th, 1995
Entry #40:  Learning to Grow----------------------------------Tuesday December 5th, 1995
Entry #41:  Of Joy and Sorrow------------------------------Wednesday January 24th, 1996
Entry #42:  Life's Little Mysteries------------------------------Monday February 5th, 1996
Entry #43:  Thanksgiving Revisited-----------------------------Thursday March 21st, 1996
Entry #44:  Levels of Awareness----------------------------Thursday December 12th, 1996
Entry #45:  Consciousness Crossroads----------------------------Sunday March 23rd, 1997
Entry #46:  Visions----------------------------------------------Tuesday September 9th, 1997
Entry #47:  Peices of the Puzzle----------------------------Saturday September 27th, 1997
Entry #48:  The Essence of Being-----------------------------Saturday December 6th, 1997
Entry #49:  The Games People Play---------------------------Tuesday February 24th, 1998
Entry #50:  Digging for Gold---------------------------------------Saturday March 7th, 1998
Entry #51:  The Power Resides in Thee-------------------------Monday February 1st, 1999
Entry #52:  Between Two Worlds------------------------------------Monday March 1st, 1999
Entry #53:  Differences of Opinion-------------------------------Monday March 22nd, 1999
Entry #54:  Cosmic Divinity-------------------------------------Wednesday April 21st, 1999
Home      About Me      Pictures     Fun & Games      Forum
Here are my original writings before I replaced them with my journal pages.
Heart and Mind: Guarding her Secrets  1-23-00
Links to the past: A place forgotten  4-8-00
Links to the past: Another link in the chain  5-18-00
My Perspective: About affinity  7-5-00
My Perspective: Of mind and soul  7-22-00
Thoughts in motion: A cry to the moon  4-22-00
Some of my views of this world
My Views on Spirituality and Faith    Posted on Friday August 30th, 2002
My Views on Love, Sex and Sexuality   Updated Friday September 17th, 2004
My Views on Fame, Wealth and Materialism   Posted on Friday September 6th, 2002
My Views on Death, Fear and Suffering   Posted on Sunday September 8th, 2002
My Views on Pride  Posted on Wednesday August 18th, 2004
Others may follow
My Early Years: A Summary
Insights Into Life: Recordings
My First Memories
My Pre-Teen Years
My Teens:  Walking in Darkness
The Great Journey:  Facing the Light
Pre-Journal Era:  The Darkest hours
From this point on I began keeping my journal on my computer.  It is a bit more consistent and is kept in monthly files.  Some individual entries do not have titles and there may be one or more entries in any given month.  Some are long, most are not. 
2000
July                     August                    September               October

2001
January                May                        June                        July

September            October

2002
April                     May                       June                        August

September             October                 November               December

2003
January                 February               March                     April

May                       June                     July                         August

September             October                November                December

2004   
January                 February               March                     April

May                       June                     July                        August  

September             October                November                December

2005

January                 February               March                     April

May                      June                      July
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